A Lawyer’s Lament

My graduate certificate program will be finished in 3 months so at the top of the year I started job hunting full time. I forgot how demoralizing it is. No interviews yet, although I’ve applied for dozens of jobs, and I’m qualified for most of them. There have been a few stretches of course, but if someone with no political experience whatsoever can be Commander in Chief, then anything is possible! #MURICA

Anyway, I’ve been applying for lawyer jobs as well as corporate ones. Corporate jobs are much easier to apply to–just send in your resume and a cover letter! No need for transcripts, writing samples, or references. Attorney openings on the other hand…SMH. First of all, half of them I don’t even bother with because they ask for top 10% or 25%. It’s no use trying to get around the grade requirement unless you’ve got five years experience or know someone at the firm who will keep your resume from being trashed (that’s a no for me on both counts). One listing that really got my ire up said “Top 25% only (or a REALLY good excuse as to why you blew it).”

Well excuse the heck outta me. Last time I checked, law school was graded on a curve which means IT’S PURPOSELY SET UP SO THAT SOMEONE GETS SCREWED. Despite the fact that the entire class may have an 85% or greater understanding of the material, the curve dictates that somebody’s going to get a grade of 70% because of the curve. I busted my behind in law school after being on the Dean’s List my whole life, but I barely squeaked by in the upper 50%. Mind you, I never received any actual negative feedback on my papers and exams the whole time. But because of the curve, most of my grades were mediocre even though I had an above average understanding of the material.

Law might be the only profession where you need an advanced degree and a state license but your grades still matter. Nobody asks doctors or CPAs for their class rank, so why does it matter for lawyers? If you have to be in the top 25% to get a job at a law firm, why didn’t they just flunk me out after the first semester of 1L year when I was only $10k in the student loan debt hole? I could have gotten 2.5 years of my life back.

Anyway. I hope my loyal readers (shoutout to all five of you, much love!) weren’t too bored by my rant. I’ll write about something more entertaining next time but I needed to whine a little bit before I go back to being adult. I know I just have to keep the faith. I only need one yes, after all.

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